By Javier Olivo
From the moment an impending father learns his partner’s pregnancy, he thrusts into an unusual new world, strongly motivated to take part in the pregnancy and birth process. But you might feel awkward about sharing your insecurities and fears as soon-to-be daddy.
You might even feel discouraged from doing anything that could upset your pregnant partner, which is both natural and disappointing. Here are some fears impending fathers commonly face:
Financial Fears – Can I Afford a New Baby?
Babies can bring a lot of costs, and many of those expenses will be new to you and your partner. You need to make sure you can meet all your family’s needs, including a bigger shelter that has enough furniture, clothes, foods and enough supply of the baby’s nappies and milk.
The good news is that with some creativity and careful budgeting, you can make the entire baby-cost thing work. You might need to give up a few things, but when the sacrifice is for the sake of your baby, it will be a little easier.
Paternity Fears – Will I Be a Good Father?
In the innermost thoughts of men, they frequently find this question to be the greatest fear of becoming a father. Ultimately, transitioning from being a partnered adult into a parenting role requires developing wisdom, personal sacrifice, and making this little future boy or girl become a responsible adult.
The answer to this question is that every guy has the choice to be a good father. Just make sure you adapt with the child, follow the example of other dads, grasp all the things you can about appropriate fatherhood, spread out or give up a few non-family activities and stick to some vital principles of effective fathering.
Relationship Fears – Will My Wife Love the Baby More than Me?
Among the most common areas of concern in entering parenthood are the problems surrounding the changes in the relationship between a man and his wife. Beyond everything, she has been your companion, and now she will be the mum of your child.
The answer to that is she will love you and your baby. However, being a mother of a new baby consumes much of her body, energy, and attention. If you gauge love by measuring the time you consume together, then it is time to look for a new measuring stick.
As a matter of fact, as you work together to raise and care for the child, your feelings and love for one another will grow even more than before.
Work related Fears – How Can I Balance My Job and My Family?
Work-life balance is one of the most important challenges you will encounter as a father. You don’t have to be afraid, instead just work at it. Talk to your employer about paternity leave, or save up your vacation leave during the time of the pregnancy so that you can have some time off after the baby is born.
As time goes on, just ensure you leave work and stay focused on your family when you are home. Nothing can replace the time you spend with your family.
Security Fears – Can I Keep the Baby Safe?
A significant fear is what occurs when you instantly have the responsibility for a fragile life that can’t care for itself. Putting a nappy correctly, holding the baby in the right way, babyproofing your home, making sure it is safe for a stroller or crib are normal fears to have.
However, education tends to thwart these fears, so it is much better to learn it first by holding a friend’s baby, grasp all you can about safe baby furniture, and so on. Some practice and learning will help. You and your wife should think about babysitting a friend’s newborn baby to get a little preparation if the future situation is making you nervous.
Adulthood Fears – Can I Make the Move to Adulthood?
More often, young guys who are soon-to-be dads have lived a kind of egocentric life where in a lot of ways they do what they want and when they want. Becoming a father also means setting the needs of the child and the family ahead of yourself and loving someone more than you love yourself.
If you think that it will be hard to lose that lifestyle, just accept that you are sacrificing for something greater than yourself. You most likely did it in school where you put your studies ahead rather than fun because you are fully aware that you are sacrificing for your future. Fatherhood and adulthood are much the same way, and it’s just that the time horizon is just longer.
Personal Fears – Will I Be Tied down for the Rest of My Life?
Somewhat, the answer to this question is yes. After all, parenting is a great job that will consume money, time and attention. So you will have to sacrifice heading out to the bar with other guys and partying all night. But that does not mean you will stay confined forever.
You can still enjoy your friendships with other guys and your friends. Just not as frequently or as extremely as you might have at one time. But this change is a good one, and if you only let it. Just go with the flow of parenting, eventually you will find your life even more fulfilling and rewarding than it was before.
Every expectant father will experience the early stages of a soon-to-be dad’s sense of impending fatherhood. They have worries about finance, relationships, disruption in life and his capability and preparation to be a father.
Fortunately, like every other young father who passed through this stage, you will adjust to these significant changes and transition into the role of fatherhood as a redefined man, partner or husband.
Javier Olivo is blogger and writer who writes about interior designing, luxury furniture, and dream houses. Although he usually talks about the structural features of houses and rooms, Javier also likes to write about parenthood and relationships. During his free time, he takes his family out for a picnic.