HOW TO REDUCE YOUR TODDLER’S SEPARATION ANXIETY

Written by Feba Maryann  

If we were to talk about separation anxiety a decade ago, then almost no one in the room would have a clear answer to brief on. But, sometimes things may seem going so off the limit that it could make us realize that this is more than just a significant sign of attachment. The subject has been so negligibly considered that now eventually it gained importance invariably amongst children and adults, due to its rising commonality. Yes! Separation anxiety is for real and can owe to the peculiar behavior that your child exhibits upon feeling detached.   

Working parents are often blamed for being the inculcating factor of their child’s separation anxiety, especially in a nuclear household. But let’s not continue the blame game, and seek perspective on what needs to be taken care of. Here are some tips to go by, towards reducing your child’s separation anxiety:   

Toddler Dependence  

It’s quite natural for your child to feel extremely attached to you because of their apprehension that they depend on you for their primary existence. So when you are gone for a brief time, it can leave them devastated as they feel as if the separation is permanent. This can be avoided to an extent, by trying to adjust to your child’s routine and conveniently doing your thing when he or she is either sleeping or seems to be tenaciously occupied with something else.  

Add-Ons To Anxiety  

We all know that adults sometimes pose themselves in a situation where they’re just a tad bit weird owing to their growling hunger. If this can be the case in adults then imagine the magnitude of the aggravation that factors like hunger, fatigue, and sleep issues can cause in adding on to your child’s anxiety. So as inching steps towards taking the edge off your child’s separation anxiety, try to focus on smaller issues like these to make some progress.  

Fight Your Fickle-Minded Notions   

Facing some reckless behavior from your child upon being separated, even for the smallest period can be emotionally draining for you. Sometimes when you witness their hysterical tantrums remain attached to you, for a second you might even feel it wouldn’t seem wrong to think of your actions as ruthless selfishness. But here’s the thing, you are not doing it all wrong by trying to earn a livelihood to support your kid! It is a civilized necessity and something that needs to be done for the better good.  

Promise Is A Promise   

When you leave your child on their own or with someone, it is the pivotal trust that they have in you that helps them overcome their anxiety, especially in their initial years. So keeping your word in the case of when you will be returning can help diminish their anxiety, as they would somehow look forward to passing their time in between. Try to do so in a way that they can easily decipher, like mentioning returning in the afternoon by saying you’ll be back once he or she is done with the second meal of the day!  

But here’s the tricky part, separation can be mutually disheartening for both kids and their parents. So if you lose that steadfast control over your mind and maybe return sooner than your toddler was told, you could be lighting the unwanted flames of hope in them in the consecutive days to come. Try to maintain your promise in terms of coming back-Remember! Nothing more, Nothing less.  

Hugs And Kisses To The Rescue!  

A nice way to deal with your child’s hefty antics is to practice a sweet way of parting when you’re off to somewhere. Offer tight hugs or generous kisses when you leave but make sure you’re not too effusive because when you are, you tend to dramatize the separation and in turn widen the transition that your toddler has to face. Keeping it short and sweet is the knack and try not to linger around too much despite your child’s tenacious gestures. Don’t worry, move ahead and consistently follow the ritual because hopefully once you’re out of their sight, they might soon get distracted with other occupying interests that are provided.  

Get Them Being Used To Be Without You   

Ensuring your toddler has the opportunity to come out of their habitual lifestyle once in a while, equips them to fight their insecurities on their own. In their fledgling times especially before pre-school make use of all extended family support like vacations, and sleepovers with cousins and playdates with friends to enable your toddler to familiarize what it is like to be without you so that they can prepare to survive independently.   

Just In Case!  

Mostly it seems atypical, but if your child still doesn’t fit in after prolonged times, then feel free to have a chat with your doctor.