How To Overcome Fear of Birth

Written by Jana Angeles 

We all have fears. No matter what they are, it is normal to feel scared over something. Sometimes, we tend to criticise ourselves for it because as we’ve grown older, we deal with the cards of our future, our health and our goals that we want to achieve. Sometimes, going with the flow is all you can do and having the support of your family and friends is all you need to get through the pregnancy period.  

It’s tough carrying a child in your womb and it’s even more challenging to get through this as a first experience. Fearing birth is normal for most women. It is unfamiliar and something we can’t really prepare for. There will be pain felt and you’ll think it’s going to last forever, but in the end, it will all be over and the end goal will be holding your child in your arms. How can we cultivate positive experiences as the birthdate of our child looms over us? Here are some tips you can take on board to help you with your journey. 

Spend Time With Women Who Have Had Positive Experiences 

It’s awesome being around people who have positive energy about birth. Not only will you feel inspired, but you will feel less scared as you approach your third trimester. Having someone who has been through it all will help you feel less isolated and have the courage to overcome this fear of birth. Ask all the pressing questions, listen to their experiences and admire the advice they give you. This will help you feel at peace, giving you faith that if these women could give birth, so can you!   

Go On A Negativity Diet 

It is draining if you constantly put yourself down and dread the day you give birth to your child. Sometimes, when it comes to the bad days of pregnancy, we tend to second guess ourselves and wonder if all of this struggle is worth it. Obviously, pregnancy is not sunshine and rainbows. You will have days of morning sickness, guilt and constant mood swings.  

Having all this negative energy can affect your mental health, so it’s important to recognise this early so you can seek professional help or speak to a trusted relative and family member. If you lay off the negative energy for a while, you will feel lighter and harmonious with your pregnancy. Trust that no feeling is permanent and that things can look glum one second then happy the next.   

Do A Relaxing Activity  

Whether it’s learning how to crochet, getting creative with colours and unwinding with a good book, it’s important to undertake activities that keep your mind off giving birth. Sometimes, we get too carried away in looking up videos, reading articles and documentaries that these can often place a negative perspective on birthing. Remember that each experience is unique and individual. Do your best to go on a digital detox and stop getting into the habit of researching horror birth stories or “births gone wrong” clickbait articles. Know your sources and only keep up with websites and publications that you can trust (like us!). Otherwise, remember to just unwind and enjoy the simple pleasures that keep you relaxed.

Find Support in Your Family and Friends  

This is an important thing to establish with your family and friends and that is seeking support during the tough times of pregnancy. You may have been overthinking about birth a lot and that’s totally fine! Sometimes, overthinking can lead to negative thoughts and doesn’t give us a chance to think clearly. If you feel like this, call up your family and friends and organise a meet up. Let them in on your thoughts and see how they react. Sometimes, all you really need is someone to listen and  show you reassurance that things will be okay. This can help you get back on track into thinking positive thoughts about birthing. 

Overall, doing the above can help you relax and prevent you from being soaked into the negativity of birth. No matter the experiences your peers or friends have had, you must remember that when it comes to you, it will be new and entirely different. On the days where pregnancy is good, cherish it because there are more moments to look forward to after giving birth.