Right or wrong, good and bad
Written by Sheree Echlin
Am I a bad mum? Do I give in too easily or am I too harsh? Honestly some days I wonder if I’ve somehow swapped my children without realising and ended up with tiny devils in their place. Yes, I do have good days with them…I think. Maybe I imagined them all. Just kidding.
My girls are generally pretty good kids but holy moly they can become downright pains in the bum in the blink of an eye. I know it’s a stage that will pass, just like everything else, but it feels like it’s dragging on forever and ever and ever. The years might be short but the days and nights are endless, haha.
I guess it’s all about perspective. In the whole scheme of things, nothing is really that bad. But when you’re tired, run down or have a million things to do, kids getting on your nerves, pushing your buttons or just generally driving you insane, it doesn’t take much for you to reach the end of your tether. And when mummy loses it, it’s not always pretty.
I still love watching my girls when they play together nicely and even when they look out for each other. Small things like that can often go a long way. But all it takes is one little (or big) whack from one sister to the other and things can take a turn for the worse. Tears, tantrums, a few more random whacks (usually from the youngest to the eldest, mind you) and we almost have all out war.
When you first become a parent, you don’t think about dealing with sibling fights, in fact it barely registers on your mind. You’re too busy caught up in the newborn haze of nappies, feeds and no sleep. Even with one child, things feel full on and crazy all the time. But they aren’t.
It’s not until you throw two in the ring (children I’m talking about) and then you become an umpire. The downside is you’re not meant to pick sides. Guiltily I do sometimes, it depends on which child is annoying me that little bit more (hahahaha) but nine times out of ten, they both learn not to mess with mummy! Okay, so maybe it’s more like six out of ten times, but a Mumma can dream, can’t she?!
And they know just when to start, well pretty much anything. You go to hang washing out, put rubbish in the bin, go to the toilet or just really need to concentrate on something and it’s on like Donkey Kong. They say silence is deafening, but I swear sometimes just hearing “Mummmmmmmmy” mixed with crying and screaming over and over again can be worse. They fight over pretty much anything these days, even me.
It’s kind of endearing until you have arms and legs pushing and shoving just to sit on your lap. Good old sibling rivalry, it just makes my day….not. I remember the days of trying to get my older brother in trouble with mum and dad. It didn’t always work but the satisfaction when it did….man payback was and sometimes still is the best feeling ever.
I know I’m not a perfect mum and quite often I get angry or upset with my girls, I try not to but it happens. Partly because they get on my nerves and also partly because I’m over being or rather trying to be “nice” mummy all the time. But this is a tough gig and it can take its toll on anyone and everyone. I still reach for the wine and chocolate when I can, they are my saviours, along with a couple of really amazing friends.
We compare horror stories (commiserate, vent and sometimes share wine) and it’s always nice to know you’re not alone, even if you feel like you are. I know one tough stage will pass into another but it never takes away from the current never-ending phase of torture. Okay, a bit extreme maybe, but I never thought there could be so much drama over pulling the plug out of the bath or even helping put dishes away (I know right?!). #firstworldproblems haha!
Ahhhhh kids, they will either make you or break you, maybe even both at different stages. I swear, at times, my two are determined to break me, but I like to remind them of where they learnt some of their sass from. The apple certainly didn’t fall far from this tree. Bring it on kiddos, but maybe wait until I’ve had some wine or chocolate first!
Jump onto my website www.shereeechlin.com and check out where I go wrong and sometimes where I get it right. Until next time….